Nothing Comes Easy

"Is there anything that comes easy in this country? Anything?" asked Hubby on the phone to me today. This was one of the few conversations where I agreed with him entirely.

"Yes, weight gain" I answered, because that was the only thing I could think of that comes easily in this country besides aggravation, frustration, and everything similar.

Hubby's business owes back taxes. Like a good citizen, he's ready to pay it all. The money is sitting in the bank ready for income tax. But since April, they haven't taken it. They don't want it because they want to clear up some prehistoric thing that a former accountant never gave in to them.

"You don't have to worry, you won't have to pay a thing on the 1997 return" the accountant assured us.

But meanwhile, they put a lien on our bank account and threatened to take our stuff because we haven't paid them yet. Even though it's there for the taking. Look, if they don't want our money, I'm certainly fine with that. I could use it for a much-needed holiday, or an LCD or a stereo system.

And then last week, at a friend's wedding, my friend Abdullah came over to tell me that he thought he saw my security guard daughter on the bus the other day and when he asked her "Are you JG's daughter?" She told him "No." I called her immediately when Abdullah left to eat some grape leaves on the far side of the wedding hall.

"Did you see my friend Abdullah on the bus the other day and did you tell him that you weren't my daughter???"

"Yes"

"WHY??"

"Because I don't like your friends." meaning, she was embarrassed by the way he looked (bandana, wild curly hair, same green jacket he's wearing for years, etc.) and by the way he talked - with a heavy Arabic accent. She didn't have to explain. I knew.

If she's going to be rude and racist, I warned her if she's going to disown me as her mother to my friends, then when I'm filthy fucking rich, I'll remember that, and she will be sorry. So very sorry.

This morning I see a letter from the municipality telling me I don't get a water discount because I only have three people in the household? Huh? Since when did my two daughters up and leave me? Hell, if that's the case, I'm taking over their bedrooms as an office and guest room/exercise/hippie lounge respectively. But when I checked this morning, all their things were still there. I called up the municipality to tell them how stupid they are, so they now want me to send them my daughters' ID cards so they can prove they live with me.

I checked with my kids and both have our old address on their ID. So the municipality believes I moved to a new place with Hubby and son and left my two daughters behind in the old house. That thought had crossed my mind once or twice, but I never acted on it. Really.