Weekend Survival Tips

We survived the weekend with the two Haifa refugees, and our newlywed daughter and Hubby. We even had a more traditional Shabbat than usual. Son-in-law didn't care what we do in our home but my daughter had more angst about it.

"Make sure you have a 'plata' on" she begged - a plata meaning a hot plate where one doesn't cook on the Sabbath but is allowed to warm up pre-cooked foods on a hot plate instead. Plus her Hubby drinks tons of mint tea, so the water had to be pre-boiled and put on the hot plate as well for drinking throughout the Sabbath.

I needed some peace and quiet this weekend, so they came at a good time. We banned all cellphones (on vibrator only) and there was no TV or music playing. Only the quiet noise of backgammon and chess playing and the rustling of newspapers could be heard.

My married daughter and I usually have a routine of pretending we're Russian women at mealtime on Friday night, where we talk in Russian accents and curse in Russian. My daughter started.

"Peederas!! (homo!)"
"Piesdietz!! (slut!)"

The blonde teenage refugee looked absolutely horrified, as we laughed at these naughty words. We realized we cannot play "Russian" this weekend - her folks are Russian and she can not only teach us more words, but can understand what was being said.

The refugees together with my daughter went to town later that night and sauntered back in around 8:30 am on Saturday. Hubby had set up the tent for them on our porch, but by 10:30 am, the heat was unbearable and they collapsed on our couches.

"Why are THEY all sprawled out on the couch?" asked my daughter.

Hubby - "Because I forgot to lock the porch door."

The two laughed.

We had time to taunt each other throughout the day. The Complainer wanted a job waitressing where my married daughter waitressed.

"She can't even speak English properly - how can she waitress?" asked one of my older daughters.

"Would you like some piss-ghetti with ong-ions???" she asked - mimicking the way the Complainer actually pronounces these words.

"That might get her extra tips if the customers have a good sense of humor" I interjected.

Anyway, many of the waitresses in the meat section of that restaurant are now engaged to be married in the next few months. Maybe it's a lucky restaurant. I think I'm gonna send my next two oldest daughters there to work and find decent husbands.

Anybody take Ong-ions with that please?