I wouldn't dare

I had a routine mammogram done today. I told my kids I'm having my boobs squished and I dreaded the visit. It's no picnic having boobs squished against a pane of glass and the base of the machine. They do it four times. Vertically and horizontally. The techie was a woman who questioned me relentlessly about menopause since she was two years older and was wondering whether she was pregnant or whether it was menopause.

"Do you get nightsweats?" She asked, while crushing the glass or hard plastic down on my boobs.

"OUCH!!! Hasn't anyone come up with something better than this? Why are you doing this to innocent people? Why not just do this to criminals? No, I don't get night sweats, only hot flashes."

"Hot flashes? How long do they last?" she asked while crushing my boobs vertically this time.

"AAAAAAAYYYYYYYY don't have hot flashes more than a couple of minutes."

"There, don't breath" she said.

I don't dare to.

Back at the office the Professor called me from the West Coast of the USA - I didn't understand something someone had written and sent to him. I told him I had to check with the author of the document.

"You don't want to be a clerk, now DO YOU."

"Is this a promotion from being a SLAVE" I thought, but didn't dare say it.

Meanwhile, the reformatory was calling in between the Professor's calls from overseas telling me ex-Criminal hadn't arrived yet. She was 6 hours late and they were about to let the police know she was on the loose. I gave them her talkman phone number which we had given to her over the weekend. She was on leave from the place over the weekend and was supposed to spend her time with us. Instead she spent it with her boyfriend and family.

I blamed it all on daughter herself. But Hubby was pissed - not at her but at the boyfriend's family. "It's their fault for having her stay with them, for allowing it. I should go ahead and call them and tell them exactly what I think of them.

I wouldn't dare.