Pass that Sperm please

One of the funniest things I read in the papers yesterday morning, that made me spit out my de-caf coffee laughing away, was that murdered prime minister killer, Yigal Amir, was caught smuggling sperm to his wife in jail.

You wonder - how did they catch him?

How did they try and smuggle it. orally? with his dinner? in a cup? spoon? a handshake?

Wonder what the conversation like between the guards who caught him and his wife.

This is true fodder for Jay Leno.

Guard: Can I see that?

Amir: See what?

Guard: What you just passed to your wife.

Amir: It's just phlegm. I got this awful cough, see?

Guard: You're passing phlegm to your wife?

Amir: She's into holistic shit and all that. She'll test it and see what I have.

Guard: Test it! That's what we're afraid of. No one's testing that. Gimme that!

He grabs ahold of the cup/spoon or whatever. Larissa tries to take it back - screaming "My baby! My baby!" It goes all over the guard's face. The guard is like - fuck! That shit tastes awful!

But they won't print that scenario in the papers.