Weathering it

I'm as moody as the weather here - Israel's weather god, can't make up its mind whether it should be summer or winter yet, which is causing me to dress totally inappropiately every day. One day it's boiling, one day it's cool and rainy, and the men here aren't any better.

My brother told me on Friday that his son's wedding's color will be predominantly green.

"Why green?" I asked. "Shouldn't it be orange?" thinking they are politically "orange". They're not Irish, for Guinesses' sake.

"Because that's the "in" color in America right now. Which means it'll be the "in" color in Israel next year!" he remarked. Yeah right, Mr. know-it-all.

"Since when do Israelis copy American fashion??" I retorted.

"They always do".

"Do not." Just because he was an A student in college, does not mean he gets an A with me.

I continued my tirade. "Israelis copy European fashion. Since when do you see Israeli teens walking around looking like Americans in sneakers, jeans and sweatshirts?? Don't you see what these kids look like?? The fashion here comes from Europe - Italy and France primarily."

"Really?" He was getting silent.

"Yeah. And since when are YOU such a fashion maven? Only gay guys are in the know about these things."

I think I stunned him into total silence.

"Hello? Are you still there?"

"My wife didn't wish you a mazal tov" - said he, changing the subject.

And this morning on the way to work, with my Good Daughter in the back seat, I asked her a simple question.

"Do you like the way I parted my hair on the side now?"

Hubby overheard and commented - "Ridiculous! At your age!!"

Parting my hair on the side at age 50 is ridiculous??? Hmmmmm. Someone help me figure this one out.

Obviously a co-worker had much of the same kind of male-trips on her side of the pond. She is close in age to me and she is always jokingly offering me some of her pretty blue prozac pills which look so appealing. But I am not the pill popping kind, unless they're chocolate M&Ms.

She ranted on to me - "My husband tried to play with my boobs last night. It was just awful. And he tries to wake me in the middle of the night for this. It's so annoying - like someone trying to stick a finger in your ear."

I laughed and laughed. Girl, I am SO with you.