Running on Overload

I'm one of those people that think they're superhuman. I hardly say no to any request. The word NO is evil, harmful, unhealthy, negative, bad karma, etc. And this gets me into trouble. I've accumulated a slew of friends since I've moved here and for that I'm grateful. It's enriching to have companions who you can call up and do stuff with. One friend in the States for the summer? No sweat. Just call up the 50,000 other ones to accompany you on eating binges, movies, concerts, etc.

Some are persistent, like the young Palestinian man whom I wanted to set up on a "shidduch date" with another young Arab woman. "When can I visit you?" "Can you get me a permit?" "Can I take you to Ramallah?" And he doesn't stop. I swear when I see him next, I'll put ritalin in his mint tea.

Then there are the pen-friends. I feel like I'm 15 when I say that, but I've never met many of them. One non-Jewish German woman began to write me after reading about me in Gush Shalom's newsletter. Unbeknownst to me, the person I was talking to when I went olive picking last fall with Rabbis for Human Rights, was the writer of their newsletters. I casually told him where I was from, no big deal, just outside of Jerusalem.

"You're a settler!!" he cried out, causing a bit of a local ruckus. I was the one-and-only settler woman who came out from beyond the green line to assist the Palestinian farmers and this certainly deserved a mention in their newsletter. This lovely German woman who reads every newsletter under the sun, began writing me on a daily basis asking me all sorts of questions and sending me articles from all over the globe.

"what do you think of this"
"What do you think of that?"

Lady - I really think you have way too much time on your hands.

Unfortunately, I work for a living and can't get to the myriad of e-mails she sends me. I try to tell her politely that I'm too busy to read 100,000 pages a day, and try to answer her shorter queries.

Then my Queen-of-the-Gypsies friend rings me up - she is looking for volunteers for her organization. Can I help? Nu, sure! What are friends for? I just use our local English-speaking e-mail listing - Janglo (Jerusalem Anglos) - and in 5 minutes the ad is out. I used to visit her weekly and answer her e-mails for her, but it got to be too much like work. The last thing I need is another full-time job - without pay. Sheesh, I'm not that nuts. But when I cut out the weekly visits, you can believe I felt as guilty as any Jewish mother.

My ex-Criminal daughter, on her way back to her place of residence today, called me dozens of times today for me to do conference calls with her boyfriend.

"Don't answer her calls!" hissed the receptionist.

"I can't not take them! She's on "parole" for another hour and won't be able to make any phone calls for 3 weeks." I had to cope just one more hour.

I have a shitload of things on a waiting list of things I'd like to do - like learn Arabic, take photography lessons, belly dance, travel to India, eat in every decent restaurant in the country, go to Turkey, Cyprus, Morrocco, travel the Silk Route, meet Richard Gere, meet newly discovered relatives in London and Vienna, see family in New York, work in the movie industry, buy a home, furnish it according to Feng Shui, cook gourmet meals each day, answer my e-mails in a timely fashion, go on holiday with my kids, go on a spa vacation without them, hike all over Israel, invite the Arabs in Gaza for a Sulha with the Jews in Gaza, win a Nobel Peace Prize.....the list is simply endless.